funny bone

Posts Tagged ‘sucks’

not the time to cop an attitude

Are you Half-Full?

My mom was (even to the end). And she really-really tried to pass her look-on-the-bright-sideness to me.  I thought about her A LOT on Friday…

Lucky or Unlucky, depending on how you look at it.

It’s a typical I’ve-planned-too-many-things-Friday when I realize traffic isn’t cooperating. The thing is, since they started construction on the 405 (which seems like for.ever ago) there’s no way to know how long it’ll take to go anywhere in this city! I get up early and head to the Westside, because I’m addicted to Steve Ross’s classes at Maha Yoga and the juice cleanses from Pressed Juicery at 26^th & San Vicente.

Feeling mellow after class and carrot-coconut juice I figure I’ve got plenty of time to make it to my Acting Class in West Hollywood. WRONG!  Heading east, there’s gridlock everywhere. Sunset’s backed-up. Wilshire’s backed-up. So I end up driving through the residential streets – meaning stop sign to stop sign —  through Westwood, then Beverly Hills — and that’s where I realize I’m running out of time. So I  sorta scoot through one intersection, forgetting to yield to the guy in the truck to my left. Oops! Two blocks and multiple flashing-lights later I get BUSTED! Read the rest of this entry »

Yikes!

OMG! Welcome to my —

N I G H T M A R E !

It’s an EMERGENCY SITUATION

Tonight in Triage —

• A high maintenance celeb panic-attacking
• A screamy-meemy breaking my eardrums
• A flu-inflicted boy leaving a very gaseous trail
• A foreigner with his infected toe oozing out of his socks
• A moany mommy in labor with a freaked-out baby daddy
• A hungry homeless man begging for a hot meal
• An oldie-but-definitely-not-goodie barfing
• A super cute paramedic rolling in a bloody GSW
• A cocky gynecologist making me chaperone his pelvic exam (Euuu!)
• A bitchy resident making it her job to torture me
• Charlayne, my supervisor giving me the evil eye

I thought I’d gotten better about handling things, but gross bodily fluids don’t work for me.

Get me some wine and a midnight yoga class, stat!

CODE whatever!

Just get me outta there!

OMG! I’m such a KLUTZ!

find the funny even when it hurts

Before my 1:00 shift today I thought I could squeeze in a mani|pedi. (Wrong!) I was excited to look my best for my meeting tonight at Craigs with a up-and-coming Writer/Director. Apparently I miscalculated.

Upsettingly, the whole process took longer than usual (How would I know Nail Spa Lane would be busy on a Monday?) Realizing I was LATE, I ran through the alley, and hopped over a planter, but my flip flop got caught on the ledge and I landed face-down on the pavement. OUCH! Read the rest of this entry »

Lisa's smiling, oh yeah!

Yesterday my acting partner, Nick sent me a link to an article Ken Levine wrote during TV Pilot Season last year. It’s fun to read whether you’re in the TV business, trying to be in the TV business or just watch TV.

I texted back —

So funny! Love it for my blog.

Nick’s comeback —

FUNNY?!  It made me cry!

I mean, Nick’s technically right. It’s ultra-depressing that one of the prerequisites of a Hot Girl role is that the producers look for someone “guys wanna f#@k.” And trust me, this is absolutely true. A major TV producer told me that point blank! Read the rest of this entry »

I’m starting off Monday with “The Rules of Being Human” because I’ve been making lots of mistakes lately like—

• Dropping my iPhone in the toilet (hope that’s not a sign.)

• Setting off the fire alarm in the ER (oops! I was just hungry.)

• Freezing in my audition (this producer I dated and um– avoided was sadly in the room.) Read the rest of this entry »

How do YOU see it?

Seems like the world is filled with two kinds of people:
the ones who look at the bright side,
and the ones who acknowledge the dark side.

So are we talking– Read the rest of this entry »

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxPcmi1U25g

I’m the first to admit that unexpected hotspots can be sizzly, but after last night in the ER, I’m going to be a lot more cautious in that particular creative department, though you’d think I would’ve learned that lesson by now (oops!) Read the rest of this entry »