Phew!

Sometimes when I’m lucky I wake up in an unexplainably good mood and the whole day smiles with possibility. But other times (like last night) my brain storms overtime with thunderous worrywart issues that get bigger and BIGGER — I can’t budge from bed, but I can’t go back to sleep either. It’s a nightmarish, paralyzing, painful state where I’m stuck worrying about relationships (or the lack thereof), or escalating credit card bills, or an audition I blew, or something I said and now wish I hadn’t.

FAUX PAS and PROBLEMS Echo in My Ears —

And — even though I know my problems are small compared to the ones I see in the ER, or watch on the news or read in my email alerts, they’re on my mind, magnified and they belong to me —  not someone I don’t know. Emotional DRAMA zaps my common sense, causing me to act CRAZY — making things even worse than they were before. Ugh! Keep Reading»

Lately I’ve had the Baking Bug, trying out recipes before the HOLIDAYS (and if I have to be honest, because I’ve been craving something sweet).

The FIRST & the LAST Bites are always the BEST!

Evie’s Apple Nut Coffee Cake

I always allow myself two bites of yummy batter and two bites of whatever I’ve made when it’s fresh-out-of-the-oven. I’m sure you know this —  because it’s a well-known fact —  if you stand in the kitchen and eat bites, it’s not really fattening : )

My Dad and his sweet tooth, are always on my “goodie basket drop-off list”, and our little neighbor Owen loves my chocolate cake with M&Ms.  But even when I share with them, there’s still too much TEMPTATION left over, and that last thing I need to do before an Audition is stuff my face. Keep Reading»

do it!

COURAGE COMES IN ALL SIZES —

In the news this week: Teen activist Malala Yousafza is awarded the top human rights prize by the European Union! Will she win the Nobel Peace Prize next? My guess is “yes!” Malala is only sixteen but when she was fourteen she stood up to the Taliban, advocating the right of education for all children. Even an assassination attempt and a series of surgeries have not deterred her.

WHEN MALALA SPEAKS, WE LISTEN —

“AFRAID OF NO ONE”

courage comes in all sizes

Whether Malala is on the Daily Show or addressing the United Nations, she’s articulate, forthright and wise way-way-way beyond her years. Hearing Malala’s melodious inflection, I am reminded of the optimism of Anne Frank and the dream of Martin Luther King. The courageous among us see the big picture clearly, regardless of age. They step into the fire willingly, courageously, superhumanly automatically.

“Comfort Zone” is NOT a Concern for the Courageous! Keep Reading»

Is FOREVER AND EVER a figment of my imagination?

Is he someone I can’t have, so that makes me want him more? Or is he in my heart deeply, purely, completely because we’re meant to be?

Are we just a romantic moment? A true love story? Best friends? Soul mates? Two simply in sync?

Or is he a drug zapping me of sense of time and consequence? Do I experience withdrawal because I’m I addicted to the fantasy?

looking for “the one”

Am I a physical attraction that will fade from his romantic sunset? The chase that’s no longer exciting, once he catches up?

Will he slay dragons and swim through shark infested waters through sickness and frustrating life-sucking situations? Will he stick with me when I get crabby, stomachache-y and emotional monthly? Keep Reading»

“head up ass”

On my Volunteer Shift, when I take Patients to beds, I glance at the chart to see what the complaint is so I don’t ask them to remove more clothes than they have to. That’s not exactly a Volunteer Rule (Charlayne trained us to say: “Remove all of your clothes, gown open to the back”).  But in my opinion, it’s unnecessarily annoying to Patients if you add to their discomfort.  If they’re in the ER for a hurt finger or toe, I’m certainly not gonna make them take off all of their clothes (“do unto others…”). But if they have a gyno, abdominal or rectal issue, it’s protocol that they remove everything and pee in a cup, so I can’t always grant myself rule-exception privileges.

Over time I’ve learned all of the color codes and what abbreviations mean like A fib (heart irregularity) or AMS (altered mental state) or CP (chest pains), but today Anthony Chan was in a particularly pissy mood (which happens frequently) and he wrote down DBI for this tat-covered greaser with missing teeth. I’d never seen that abbreviation before, so I had to ask Tyrell what it meant.

DBI might not be something they teach in medical school (or maybe it is, which would be really scary!) But either way doctors know DBI means: “dirt bag index.” Oh. Keep Reading»

feeling half-glass full

Another summer OVER.

Can I say the same for my professional Dry Spell?

Man, I hope so!

I really motivated myself this summer so I’ll be ready to ROCK the GUEST ROLE AUDITIONS this Fall. I need to be in front of the camera so everyone will remember what I can do – what I can be. Call it “prepping for PILOT SEASON.”

Summer Finds and Finding Myself

Spent the summer working on my inner and my outer — coaching actors, TA-ing at an Acting School, doing a small part in an Indie for a friend, and slimming down with the best discovery – my Yonana machine! It’s my version of a juice cleanse – but it tastes like ice cream, or sorbet, or Italian ice (depending on the ingredients). I can’t say enough about this fab find. My favorite combos are Peaches & Vanilla Yogurt Yonanas or Pineapple and Coconut Milk Yonanas. I got the bigger machine online from Bed Bath and Beyond –Yonana Elite is 2 ½ times more powerful) — and my freezer is packed with mini containers of frozen fruit, yogurt and coconut milk (haven’t tried almond milk yet). Frozen super-ripe bananas mixed with nothing tastes exactly like banana ice cream. I could go on and on, but enough on Yonanas…

Josh (my agent) said I need to glam up more for auditions, so I went to Barneys where Patrick (make-up artist extraordinaire) did my face before my audition yesterday (sure, I bought a ton of make-up — but Patrick gave me great tips so I can do it myself from now on).

Then last night— Keep Reading»

heart-wrenching emotion

Projects from personal experience connect us, move us, touch us universally. Destin Daniel Cretton’s Short Term 12 has all of the components of an unforgettable film – it makes you laugh, cry, feel and remember – long after the final credits.

The acting is so natural, it feels more like a documentary. It’s like we can read Brie Larson’s complicated mind as she struggles to maintain her reputation as “Grace All Mighty.” John Gallagher Jr.’s “Mason” (I knew I recognized him from somewhere – he’s Jim Harper in The Newsroom!) exudes a vulnerable warmth that’s rarely seen onscreen.

Bring Tissues!

If someone were to tell me that all of the teens in the Home are actually At-Risk Kids who’ve experienced OCD, depression, abandonment, abuse, you-name-it, I’d believe it. We feel their pain, share their triumphs, ache for them, root for them, keep thinking about them…keep thinking about them…keep thinking about them…

It’s obvious Destin Daniel Cretton has lived this experience in some way — his film is pure and from the heart. You’ll want to check out SHORT TERM 12 as soon as possible. Even sooner if possible! It’s A.MAZ.ING! Keep Reading»