Accepting the NOT MEANT TO BE

in the end

How do we know if we need to work harder for something we really want or if it’s time to give up, time to let go? That’s a tough question, because when we’re in the middle of it – like a career we think we’re right for, but stuck halfway up a very high hill —  or a relationship that’s good in some ways, but maybe not good enough when it comes to forever and ever — we just don’t know.

It’s confusing because we might get a lot of positive feedback in our chosen CAREER (like I get from Casting Directors, or people I’ve worked with in the past) but not a lot of jobs.  Or maybe the POSSIBLE SOULMATE we adore opens up a little bit more (like a certain doctor in my ER), but then pulls back… Ugh!

“To Be or Not To Be…”

Life has a lot of sorta-right-sorta-wrong gray areas, where we’re sorta stuck… sucked in by emotional quicksand.

And it’s a case-by-case situation – there’s no crystal-ball-global-answer, which is beyond frustrating!  Sometimes it helps if we do an out-of-body and look in – like we’re advising a best friend who’s in the exact same situation.

What advice would I give myself if I’m being totally objective?

I think it all comes down to listening to my inner voice, the voice that keeps me up at night when I can’t sleep. It’s a combo of instincts and heart with a few brain cells mixed in for a reality check. And sometimes I get good answers when I go for a long walk, when the air is clear, the sky is blue, and I’m not being bombarded by landlines, cellphones, emails, Instagram, Pinterest and news alerts.

Make a list, mental or a physical — of the PROS and CONS —

Ask yourself:

What do I get out of holding on to this?
Am I holding on because I’m so passionate about this Person? Career? Job? Idea?
Or am I just afraid of walking into the darkness, not knowing what might be next?

We all know that when “one door closes another door opens.” But we also know that sometimes we have to fight for something worth fighting for. Relationships are hard. Work is called “Work” for a reason.

I don’t have the answers, but I’m about to start my list of pros and cons. And I’m thinking that things need to move forward — we can’t stay in one place or we’ll never get anywhere, so maybe I need a column that shows how things have changed from point A to point B.

It feels like the challenge of LIFE is just figuring it all out.  Maybe that’s the point of it.

Wait, is there a point?!





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